It has been quite sometimes since I write here, why? I don't know..To say that I m busy, I don't think so but maybe a bit lazy and bored with life and maybe I don't even know what to write..
Is there anybody that would read my boring blog...I m not a good writer..
Sometimes I think is it because I m fat now so that why i become lazy and not motivated..how can I get back my figure and appreance that all this while has given me 1001 confindence.
I had once registered for a 'free trial' with a slimming center- London Weight Management but I keep postponing it until last Monday , 26 Apr 10 ...when I decided to go for the trial..
Thinking back , the main reason why I dare to go is because of $$$$...I don't think that I can afford...
I know that I have to be more discipline to change..last time after having 4 kids, my weight is only 55-58kg..Look at the attached photo, it was way back in 2003 when i was 34 yrs old but now, my weight already reached 70.9kg...oh my god, what happen to me?..That is why I feel so ugly and not attractive at all.Last time,I feel so glamour like public figure but now ...OUT..DISGUSTING..BURN, MELT,RUBBISH...I got a lot of toxin and water inside my body..where does it come from I don't know.
After the 'trial session' at London Weight Management,I lost 1.8kg to 69.1kg...I m so happy..so fast result..it shows that if i really discipline and continue treatment at the slimming center and follow the guidelines, I can slim down to my ideal weight at 55kg within 2-3 months or if there is miracle, I can even go down to 50kg..Eeeee, I can't wait for the time to come. My only problem is MONEY...Money, money ,money....to join the program...pity me..I wish there is a way for me to find enough money ...How I wish....?????? Sugar daddy....opps..I don't think anyone would get interested on me anymore..
i need to organize my own diet..drink a lot of water, eating less rice but more fruits and vegetables....i will load in my new photo once I success get my ideal weight and figure..I 'll prove to my hubby that i m still attractive and pretty . I know he look down on me because I m jobless and fat.
Oh God, ALLAH SWT, I pray for my success and better life and future, may i become a millionaire, healthy, wealthy and successful person...amin!
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
AS AT TODAY
Today, Sue and Ayish looks so sweet and beutiful. Today is their 1st day attending training as VIP Ambassador for International Event at PWTC from 19-22 Apr 10 ni.
I was not sure to allow them to do 'part time' for the event but after thinking so many times I guess no harm for them to expose themselves with a real working environment... exposure for future knowledge,n fact, it is not easy to get an opportunity and chance like this.For me, it ia quite costly to send both of them there because I need to spend quite amount of money for their suitable outfit for the event.
Talking about money.....I think everybody must have face the same problem . The higher salary you get, the more you will spend and end up still not enough.....during my working time, I got no problem to spend for anything I and my kids want but after being 'jobless' or 'business woman', I have to think and think before spending....what a terrible life.
I guess I have to live with it at the moment...to ask from hubby, I dare to ask him but sometimes I got no choice...business, as I said.....no yet!!! Still crawling....
Doing own business is very tough but doesn't mean I cannot success..actually, I believe I can own better from those that under employment..its just that I need to put more effort, consistent and never give up. Avoid all the -ve influence, -ve thinking, or anything that is negative.
Sincerely, talking is easy than doing.... challengeeeee.
I got a lot to share but...next time la..
I was not sure to allow them to do 'part time' for the event but after thinking so many times I guess no harm for them to expose themselves with a real working environment... exposure for future knowledge,n fact, it is not easy to get an opportunity and chance like this.For me, it ia quite costly to send both of them there because I need to spend quite amount of money for their suitable outfit for the event.
Talking about money.....I think everybody must have face the same problem . The higher salary you get, the more you will spend and end up still not enough.....during my working time, I got no problem to spend for anything I and my kids want but after being 'jobless' or 'business woman', I have to think and think before spending....what a terrible life.
I guess I have to live with it at the moment...to ask from hubby, I dare to ask him but sometimes I got no choice...business, as I said.....no yet!!! Still crawling....
Doing own business is very tough but doesn't mean I cannot success..actually, I believe I can own better from those that under employment..its just that I need to put more effort, consistent and never give up. Avoid all the -ve influence, -ve thinking, or anything that is negative.
Sincerely, talking is easy than doing.... challengeeeee.
I got a lot to share but...next time la..
Thursday, April 15, 2010
old memories
It was always in my mind about my childrens. Whenever I saw them passing by infront of me..how the life have been thru all this while..how old am i now.. Oh God, I almost forgot seeing all my kids grown up and how the 'extra company' come into my life...YEAH, My baby, Am....
Yeah, Suehana , my eldest daughter...who knows I may get 'son in law' by next year
Ayish, my 2nd daughter ..guess another Dean list for her this semester, ALL THE BEST FOR HER..
Boboy, 3rd son..happy study at your new college, new life by end of this May
Ayiep, 4th son..new hope for all the teachers at new school with all the new friends
Am..my baby...mmm, forever learn all the new thing in life, beginings of life and to build a journey of his own live
My loving hubby -Aziz, All the best with your new life and new career at new place and new collegues..retire is not the end of life but its a new starting point for the new era.
Me, yeah ..still searching where am I , where's the last Nor to be polished, to be a new Me and to build success..It's very hard to start a new Me when I have nothing left from the last time..I lost my energy, confidence level, courage,contact, money, position and my appearance..I lost everything once I put on weight which I never expect how and when but I just no longer the Nor before..there is an empty space inside me that I need to challenge , need to improve, to prove and to wake up...i knew that there's a light in front of me but I need to put an effort and fight to get it..I want to be A Millionaire..if other people can ,why can't I.
Friends, there's no friends title in my life as none of them are there when I need them..but its ok..for me with or without them, LIFE HAVE TO GO ON, NO TURNING BACK..
Yeah, Suehana , my eldest daughter...who knows I may get 'son in law' by next year
Ayish, my 2nd daughter ..guess another Dean list for her this semester, ALL THE BEST FOR HER..
Boboy, 3rd son..happy study at your new college, new life by end of this May
Ayiep, 4th son..new hope for all the teachers at new school with all the new friends
Am..my baby...mmm, forever learn all the new thing in life, beginings of life and to build a journey of his own live
My loving hubby -Aziz, All the best with your new life and new career at new place and new collegues..retire is not the end of life but its a new starting point for the new era.
Me, yeah ..still searching where am I , where's the last Nor to be polished, to be a new Me and to build success..It's very hard to start a new Me when I have nothing left from the last time..I lost my energy, confidence level, courage,contact, money, position and my appearance..I lost everything once I put on weight which I never expect how and when but I just no longer the Nor before..there is an empty space inside me that I need to challenge , need to improve, to prove and to wake up...i knew that there's a light in front of me but I need to put an effort and fight to get it..I want to be A Millionaire..if other people can ,why can't I.
Friends, there's no friends title in my life as none of them are there when I need them..but its ok..for me with or without them, LIFE HAVE TO GO ON, NO TURNING BACK..
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